Chiefs Players Reimagined as Characters in Taylor Swift’s 'Life of a Showgirl' Album
A new Taylor Swift album means it's time to have some fun. The singer released "The Life of a Showgirl," which includes 12 songs. So with that, we decided it was the perfect opportunity to assign them to Chiefs players.
But here's how we're going to do it. There's going to be one player assigned to each simply based on the name of the song that was picked prior to the album being released.
So, let's get into it.
The Fate of Ophelia
QBAlex Smith
In 2018, the Chiefs traded away quarterback Alex Smith after having drafted Patrick Mahomes the year prior. It was clear that Kansas City decided that Mahomes was their future, while turning away from Smith, which is just like when Ophelia was rejected by Hamlet.
Elizabeth Taylor
DTChris Jones
An unpredictable star defender, you never quite know what Chris Jones has up his sleeve, just like Elizabeth Taylor's next move was always a question. He also has a commanding presence on the Chiefs' defense just like Elizabeth Taylor did in everything she starred in.
Opalite
OTJosh Simmons
Opalite is a stone that symbolizes transformation and new beginnings, and with Josh Simmons, he came in and completely transformed the Chiefs' offense.
Father Figure
Head Coach Andy Reid
Every day, Andy Reid speaks to his players, praising them for the things they do well, while also disciplining them when they don't perform to his standard. He's the father figure of the Chiefs, as he's in charge.
Eldest Daughter
LB Nick Bolton
Nick Bolton is someone who might not always get all the credit in each and every game, but as a linebacker, he's tasked with cleaning up messes to help the defense. And as an eldest daughter, they might have to clean everything up but not get the credit.
Ruin the Friendship
WRTyreek Hill
During the 2022 offseason, Tyreek Hill left the Chiefs in pursuit of more money when he could have made the option to take a pay cut and stay with Patrick Mahomes and Travis Kelce, continuing to contribute to the dynasty the Chiefs were building.
Actually Romantic
JuJu Smith-Schuster
While he didn't have success with his past team, the minute he came to the Chiefs, he immediately started to excel once again. So his connection with Patrick Mahomes can easily be described as actually romantic
Wi$h Li$t
WR Xavier Worthy
In the 2024 NFL Draft, the Kansas City Chiefs selected receiver Xavier Worthy in the first round after he ran the fastest 40-yard dash ever at the NFL combine. So, for Patrick Mahomes and the Chiefs, it's clear the "fastest man alive," as he's become known, would be pretty high on their drafting wish list. And it came true!
Wood
Hollywood Brown
When the song title is in the player's name, it's just too easy.
CANCELED!
Rashee Rice
Rashee Rice received a six-game suspension before the 2025 season for violating the NFL’s personal conduct policy. This came after he was sentenced to five years of probation and 30 days of jail time following a multi-car crash on Dallas’ North Central Expressway last year. Rice made a mistake, but people continue trying to make him look like the villain even though he's accepted it and is dealing with the consequences.
Honey
Travis Kelce
If you watched "Happy Gilmore 2," then this one will make a lot of sense.
The Life of a Showgirl (feat. Sabrina Carpenter)
Patrick Mahomes
He's the leader of the team, so when it comes to the Chiefs, he's the central figure. It's clear that in Kansas City, it's The Life of Patrick Mahomes.
Cowboys Get More Bad News Amid CeeDee Lamb Injury
The Dallas Cowboys and Green Bay Packers played in a nail-biter last weekend, which ended in a 40-40 tie.
There’s an argument to be made that the Cowboys could have pulled out a win had they had arguably their best offensive player healthy in wide receiver CeeDee Lamb, who was sidelined following a high-ankle sprain suffered during the team’s Week 3 loss to the Bears.
The Cowboys have managed without Lamb. Teammate George Pickens, especially, has been dominant on the field. But now it appears that the Dallas Cowboys will be without another one of their key wide receivers when they take on the New York Jets on Oct. 5.
According to the Cowboys’ official website, Dallas wide receiver and kick returner KaVontae Turpin could be sidelined for Sunday’s game against the Jets with a foot injury that he sustained during the team’s game against the Green Bay Packers.
“During Wednesday’s media viewing period in practice, Turpin was not present,” Tommy Yarrish of the Cowboys’ website stated. “As it stands, the Cowboys do not believe Turpin’s injury will land him on injured reserve, which would sideline him for four games.”
Yarrish adds that when Turpin was sidelined, he was coming off her best performance on kickoff returns this season, clocking six returns for 175 yards, averaging out at 29.2 yards per return.
During the offseason, the Dallas Cowboys signed Turpin to a three-year, $18 million extension, under new head coach Brian Schottenheimer.
“Moving forward for the next few weeks, the Cowboys will have to figure out who they want to handle both their punt and kickoff returns,” Yarrish stated. “So far this season, Jalen Tolbert and Miles Sanders have been the only other two players to do so.”
In other news, ESPN’s Week 5 power rankings have the Cowboys at No. 23, up one spot from last week. They suggest that the team’s biggest issue on offense is third-down efficiency.
“It’s difficult to quibble about an offense that has scored 40 points twice, run the ball efficiently and has quarterback Dak Prescott playing at a high level,” Todd Archer of ESPN says in the story. “The Cowboys have even performed well without wide receiver CeeDee Lamb (left high ankle sprain), center Cooper Beebe (right ankle and foot injury) and right guard Tyler Booker (high ankle sprain). But with a defense that is struggling, the offense needs to be better on third down.”
